Advocacy & Faith
🦋 Speaking Up With Faith and Grace
The Bible is a big part of my life, just as it was a big part of Mama's. When I think about advocating for someone we love, I think about how much we need our faith during those difficult days.
Advocating can be exhausting. You are trying to understand what is happening, ask the right questions, and make sure your loved one is heard. Sometimes you are frightened. Sometimes you are frustrated. Sometimes you are running on very little sleep.
In those moments, the way we speak matters.
“A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.”
To me, this verse is a reminder that we can speak with kindness while being clear and firm. A soft answer does not mean we have to ignore a concern or leave an important question unanswered.
When I advocated for Mama, I wanted her to feel heard, respected, and included in her care. That meant listening to her and helping others understand what mattered to her.
For example, an advocate might say:
“My mother still doesn’t understand why her care plan has changed. Would you please explain it directly to her and give her time to ask questions? It is important that she understands what is happening.”
That statement is respectful, but it also makes the concern clear.
If the concern remains unanswered, you can be more direct:
“I appreciate your time, but this concern still hasn’t been addressed. What is the next step, and who will follow up with us? If you are unable to help, I would like to speak with the person who can.”
You do not have to raise your voice to make it clear that you need an answer. State the concern, explain what you are asking for, and follow up.
We cannot always choose the feelings that come over us, but we can work on how we express them. Feeling angry, afraid, or overwhelmed does not mean we lack faith. Sometimes a brief prayer helps us gather our thoughts before we speak.
“Lord, help me listen carefully, speak clearly, and have the courage to ask for what my loved one needs.”
Faith can give us strength, and a respectful attitude can help a conversation. But we cannot control every outcome. What happens to our loved ones is not a measure of how strong our faith was or how perfectly we spoke.
As advocates, we can keep learning, keep asking, and keep showing up with love.
Mama’s voice mattered. Your loved one’s voice matters. And you can help that voice be heard with both compassion and determination.
🦋 Questions to carry with you:
- What does my loved one want the care team to understand?
- Can I explain my concern clearly and ask for a specific next step?
- Before the conversation ends, do we know who will follow up and when?
May God give you wisdom for the questions, patience for the conversations, and courage for the moments when you need to stand firm.